Talk About The Things That Bring You Joy, And Invite Others To Do The Same.

Hi Friend,

Someone recently told me about an interaction they’d had with their senior team leader.

“He’s not that easy to connect with. Based on his communication style, we figured he slept in his button-down and khakis. An all work, no play kind of a guy. But that really changed after this one conversation.”

“Why? What happened?” Intrigued, I was on the edge of my seat.

“He shared something he’d learned in his judo class.”

“Why was that so meaningful to you?”

“It helped me see him in a totally new light. Honestly, the idea of him wearing a gi and practicing judo kind of blew my mind … but I guess that’s his ‘authentic self’, right? It helped me understand him better. And the fact that he revealed something so personal about himself actually made me like him more.”

This story makes sense to me.

A “cold,” unrelatable leader suddenly springs into technicolor vividness by revealing something about themselves.

I see this sometimes with senior leaders and C suite executives.

We believe that in order to be taken seriously, we can’t reveal anything personal about ourselves … that doing so would undermine our effectiveness as leaders.

But nothing could be further from the truth.

Human beings crave connection in all our relationships, including our professional relationships. Connection isn’t established simply by articulating a Big Hairy Audacious Goal and putting pedal to the metal.

Connection is created when we are generous in sharing who we are.

Connection requires integrating the Self, and not hiding our authenticity and joy when we go to the office.