The Life-Changing Magic of Resentment

Hi Friend,

Resentment is one of my least favorite emotions.

What sucking on a slice of lemon does to the face, resentment does to the spirit.

Resentment causes an inward spiral of bitterness, as we mentally catalog our grievances and complaints on repeat.

But resentment can also be a powerful teacher and guide. It can be a big flashing sign saying, “BOUNDARY VIOLATION IN PROGRESS.”

If we have the patience and tolerance for it, resentment will show us our path to freedom by showing us where we’ve betrayed ourselves.

Here’s how it works:

The next time you feel resentment, ask yourself:

What’s my part to own? As my father used to say, We teach what we allow.
What boundary do I need to (re)establish? Where do I need to say no? Some of us need to go deep on this one, and this podcast episode is a great place to kick-start efforts.
How will I reward myself for upholding this boundary or for saying no? Consent/resent is a habit. Habits are a helluva lot easier to establish if we create a reward loop for the habits we want to solidify.

Your thought experiment this week is to be on the lookout for resentment. Work the three questions/answers.

My bet is that this exercise will reveal something powerful: